Your Partner's Role During Your Birth

My role (your doula) is NOT to replace your partner. Their role is critical in pregnancy, birth, and post-partum time. Birth can be confusing to partners. First, they are watching the person they love most in this world go through something that they can't "fix," and that alone can be a challenging place for them to be. They want to fix it, and they don't know how. More importantly, this is not something they can improve or need fixing. This is something that you both go through together. A doula can help you both.

Taking a childbirth education class should be on the list. The more you understand physiological birth, the better you will be. We fear what we don't understand, which helps us prepare and navigate the journey a little easier. Let's talk energy. The energy of the room is something that you have control over. One of the most important things that we can remember is that there are many things about birth that we can't control, but let's wrap our arms around the things that we can control and that birth space is something that you can protect. If your partner understands birth, it will be easier for them to support you. Birthing people tend to like a more tranquil environment. For example, if you are in the middle of a contraction occurring during active labor, that is the time for everyone in the room to honor what you are working through. Keeping people from asking questions etc., during this time is helpful. Allowing space for quiet when you need it is critical.

Breath. I can't tell you how important this is. Your breath pattern has the power to regulate the nervous system. Breathing techniques are one of the many things I have taught my kids as soon as I knew they could use them. Labor can be a time of excitement and anxiety, so knowing how to support you with breathing is very helpful. Here is another thing that may help you. Reminding you how to breathe and the pattern that will best serve you is valuable. If we bring the focus back to the breath, we aren't as focused on fear or pain. Your partner can breathe with you, count for you, and remind you to return to the essential breath. Using the breath in the birth space creates space in your core canister, precisely what your baby needs to move down. I'll let you in on a little secret, the unsung hero of breathwork is in the exhale. You can learn more about breathing from one of my breath classes here.

Hydration. This is a tool that can be used in many ways. Hydrotherapy can be great for active labor. I will say this if you want a waterbirth, even better. This is only for some, but it is a great option. The tub promotes relaxation, and labor tends to be a little easier when the body is relaxed. The other critical element is that we NEED you to drink water throughout your labor. I like people to pee at least every hour, and people often forget when they are in labor. One of your partner's primary goals should be to ensure that you are drinking enough water and that they remind you to go to the restroom. If your bladder is full, your baby can't move down, so it's essential to empty the bladder throughout.

Encouragement. This is important. Never underestimate the ability to be encouraged. We need to hear this during this process. We need to hear at that moment when we sometimes doubt ourselves that you are there telling us that we are doing a fantastic job. That we CAN (because you absolutely can) continue. Never underestimate the power of vocal support from your partner. Here's the thing, you know them best, what motivates them, and what doesn't, so hearing your voice is very helpful. Reminding the birthing person that they are strong and amazing is beneficial.

Advocacy. Your partner knows your birth goals; if they don't, make sure they do. They can also act as a filter, meaning only some can access you. They have the power to help control the room to ensure that you only need to focus on birthing your baby. They know you best, and helping you communicate what is important to you is a critical piece of support. You both should have conversations about your wishes so that they are comfortable saying what your desires are and making sure that you feel heard and supported by everyone in that room.

A doula can help with all of this. I have seen all situations. I have seen the partner who is super excited to be fully involved with the birth, and then they get into the room and freeze. They also need support. I have seen a partner saying, I'm so glad we have a doula because I want to be in the room, but I am nervous, and then they are all hands on deck. As your doula, I support both of you. We are a team and work together to support you in whatever YOU need. You can do this! I would be honored to walk with you through this journey and support your family in the ways you wish and deserve.

XOXO-Holly

Fertility, Pregnancy and Environmental Toxins

There are many things out there that we don't need to worry about; however, if you are easily triggered, this is not the blog post for you. Now that we have that out of the way, there are many things we need to avoid during pregnancy and when we are trying to conceive. These are everyday items that I'm willing to bet we all have in our homes. As a doula, I work with clients that genuinely spend the majority of their day worrying. What is the solution? Let's work to control what we can be prepared for surprises, and please take a childbirth education class to understand physiological birth. Let's dive into some things we can control, so we have less to worry about daily. The things that are listed below are easy fixes and something that can be implemented today and trust me, you are going to want to move these items out of your daily routine.

I get it; non-stick cookware is convenient. It's also toxic. I also hear people talk about how they don't use it often or are cooking on it for a short time, and indeed it is ok. The answer to this is no. "The coating on non-stick cookware is made of a chemical called polytetrafluoroethylene (PTFE) that, when heated beyond 325 degrees F or when scratched, begins to release another chemical called perfluorooctanoate (PFOA). Suppose you're searing a steak, for example. In that case, your frying pan will easily reach 500 degrees F, practically guaranteeing the release of chemicals into your food and the air you breathe, even if your non-stick pan is in perfect condition." (You Searched for Non-Stick Cookware, n.d.) Let's talk about ceramic non-stick. These are different. According to research by Lily Nichols, as long as a food-grade glaze is used on ceramic cooking vessels, they're perfectly safe. If you need more clarification about the food-grade issue, the only consideration is that some glazes can contain lead. The FDA advises using lead-testing kits (check online or at a hardware store) to ensure your ceramic cooking vessels or dishes are food-safe. What can you use instead? Cast Iron. My favorite is the Lodge Cast Iron Skillet. Those convenient non-stick pans are not worth the toxic load they carry.

Candles. At the beginning of pregnancy and sometimes throughout, certain scents will bother you, so this may be off the table. In case it isn't, there are a few things to note. I know some love Bath and Body Works candles, but here's the thing. They are toxic. "Try to stay away from candles that are made from paraffin wax. "This is a petroleum-based wax that releases harmful chemicals when burned, including toluene and benzene (both of which are carcinogens). The fragrance that is used is another thing to pay attention to. The big problem with fragrance is that it's a catch-all term that can contain any number of mystery ingredients. Any time you see "fragrance" or "perfume" on a label, that means it's being used to hide the actual chemical makeup of the fragrance." (Goods, 2022) Many fragrances have been proven endocrine disruptors, so it's best to use candles fragranced with essential oils. Brands that I like are Skylar and Roseline's Candles.

Cosmetics, lotions, and self-care products. These, again, unfortunately, are full of ingredients that we need to be aware of. The skin is the largest organ in the body, and anything put on it absorbs into the bloodstream within seconds. First, there is a website that you can use that will help you discern what is in your products. EWG.org allows you to check over 87,550 products. This site is backed by science and is an excellent resource. According to a study by NCBI, "Phthalates, as key components in plastics, appear in many consumer products. The main phthalates in cosmetics and personal care products are dibutyl phthalate in nail polish, diethyl phthalate in perfumes and lotions, and dimethyl phthalate in hair spray. Often, their presence is not noted on labels." The interesting thing about this topic is that the cosmetics industry deems its products safe. This is their response: Marian Stanley, manager of the Phthalate Esters Panel of the American Chemistry Council, says, "Some of these concerns [from environmental groups] are based on high-dose animal testing. The exposure we see in people—and we have the CDC numbers to back that up—is remarkably low. Why bother getting rid of a highly useful product when there should be no concern?" (NCBI, 2005) Well, Marian, because it is toxic, that's why. A variety of clean beauty companies and websites offer an extensive offering of safe products. Credo Beauty is one of my favorites.

Control what you can. The above information is just some of the actions we can change in our daily routines that will make a difference. . I want you aware, then you can make the best decision for your family. We can't avoid everything. I know that some may think, I can't be afraid of and avoid everything, and I don't want you to/ I want you to take a look at things that you are exposed to daily, and if you think that you should make a change, then you should. The task of replacing all of our things can seem overwhelming. Start small. I promise you; you will be glad you did. Pick three, and move on from there. It's worth it!

XOXO-Holly

References:

Barrett JR. The ugly side of beauty products. Environ Health Perspect. 2005 Jan;113(1):A24. doi: 10.1289/ehp.113-a24. PMID: 15631956; PMCID: PMC1253722.

Goods, B. (2022, August 25). We Found The Best Non-Toxic Candles For a Safer Home. Better Goods. https://bettergoods.org/best-non-toxic-candles/

You searched for non stick cookware. (n.d.). Lily Nichols RDN. https://lilynicholsrdn.com/?s=non+stick+cookware

The Breath....

II found breathwork because I was out of choices. I had suffered from panic attacks out of nowhere in my mid to late twenties, and they were manageable. That is until I had my first child. Oliver was born seven weeks early and needed to spend time in the NICU. During Oliver's birth, he presented with shoulder dystocia, which landed me with a level four episiotomy. It was a stressful time, but to be honest, I didn't know any better, and there was no other way to do it. It was long days and nights spent in the NICU, and movement was strenuous. I had a difficult time doing much of anything. Sitting, walking, and laying took everything in me. Looking back, I was unprepared for the pain I was in or the trauma of his birth. I finally was able to bring Oliver home hooked up to multiple machines; my days were filled with nurse visits, healing, and caring for my baby. That is until the panic set in.

I did what everyone told me: several specialists, but nothing worked. I finally saw a therapist specializing in post-partum anxiety who suggested I try breathwork. I'll be honest; at first, I rolled my eyes and thought there was no way it would work. I was running out of patience and options, so I tried it. I did all the research, went to a few classes, did more research, and IT WORKED! I have been studying breathwork for over 20 years, and while it may seem a little far-fetched, the science behind it does not lie. As this practice became a daily use, I knew it would be helpful in the birth space. I saw and heard the same thing at every birth I attended. Whenever I heard "take a big breath in, hold it, and act like you are pooping, "I heard "breath your baby down." The other commonality was that the birthing person stared a little confused and honestly annoyed. I knew that there had to be a better way, and there is.

Science tells us that you can reset the nervous system. Breathwork activates your parasympathetic nervous system, lowers blood pressure and heart rate, supports the health of your back and pelvic floor, balances acidity, and lowers inflammation, to name a few things that this can impact. There is something called Vital Lung Capacity. VLC is the maximum air that can move in and out of your lungs. My VLC is 92%. A mathematical equation gives you that number, which tells us if you are a paradoxical breather. In other words, a shallow breather. Shallow breathing isn't helpful in the birth space.

Science tells us that if you inhale for a count of four, pause, and exhale for a count of four, and complete that four times, you can reset the nervous system. Try it; it works. This is the one breath that I have taught to every one of my children. I want them to feel in control of anxiety, stress, and excitement. If they can self-regulate, they can control more than they know. This breath works excellently for all the phases of labor. It's one of my favorites. Posture also matters. Your posture can impact your breath by 30%. Poor posture doesn't allow your lungs to inflate fully, so stand by a wall. Shoulders are touching the wall. This is your good posture. It would be best if you were intentional with your posture when doing breathwork. If the spine is elongated, your core has more room, and your diaphragm can expand fully. The diaphragm can move about four inches and spread up to five. That gives a rotating baby a lot of space.

I want you to have all the tricks for nervous system regulation and the ability to make space in your core canister so your baby can rotate. I believe there is an optimal fetal position, LOA (left occiput anterior), for a baby's position during birth. Movement and breath give you and your baby space. I teach a breath for birth class in a group setting and individually. We cover over ten breath techniques and pair those with some movements to use in the birth space for all the different phases of labor. I would love to see you! You can learn more and sign up here. I would love to see you there. If you have any questions, please use the contact me form on my website, and we can chat more!

XOXO-Holly

Essential Oils in Labor and Delivery

I often am asked what I carry in my birth bag. If I'm being honest, not much. I carry bathtub handles for the birth tub so we can do Gilligan's Guide, some amino acids for myself, my camera if you have commissioned me to photograph your birth, your visual birth plan, some N95 masks, a traditional rebozo, and a few essential oils. Everything that you or I, as your doula, needs is available at the hospital or birth center and certainly at a home birth. Now, listen, I need to be honest with you. We will get a diffuser out for essential oils if that is important to you, but the oils I bring we also use on the body to release tight muscles and fascia and help you get into your birth space. I am not going to sell you on joining an MLM, that's not my jam, but I will share the oils that I use in the birth space and some helpful ones to have on hand at home and ones that will also work on the kiddos.

The two brands that I love are Plant Therapy and Young Living. Let's talk about the ones that I love for the kiddos.

Great on-the-go hand sanitizer.

Great for Growing Pains!

Use for Face Before Bed!

Neck Massage before bed! Great Calming Oil.

I’m going, to be honest, when I met my doula bestie, she smelled amazing! Honestly, I asked her name, and then immediately asked what scent she was wearing. It was a Young Living oil. As we got to be better friends, I began to learn a lot more about oils and ditched all the products that I had been using due to the number of toxins that were in most of the products that I had been using. I ordered from her often, until I finally signed up for Young Living as I wanted to be eligible to earn free products and get a discount. In full transparency, I have no desire to have a team, sign people up, or run an essential oil business. Period. I do however feel like I should share some of my coveted products, because they smell amazing, and are good for the body! Here’s the other thing, even my husband kinda rolled his eyes when my first order came, until his neck was killing him, and I pulled out the Deep Relief. Now, it is a full-on panic if there isn’t any in the house.

The One That Every House Should Have!

Helps with anything from sore muscles, nausea, and headache.

Lime, Cedarwood, and Lavender.

I can never shut my mind off at bedtime, and this helps me a ton!

I’m not going to try to convince you that you have to have these, but they were game changers for some of my clients, and for myself. I NEVER go to birth without them! EVER! I have a lot of oils from both companies and I have never been disappointed. I have replaced all the fragrances in our home with essential oils, and have never looked back. When I started to pay attention to how toxic beauty and body products are, I had to make a change. Here is what you need to know. The associative nature of the emotions that are attached by people to scent means that those smells that we tend to link to stressful/unpleasant healthcare situations, such as the eugenol (i.e., clove) smell of a visit to the dentist’s surgery, can all too easily end-up making us stressed (Robin et al., 1998, 1999). Over the years, researchers have also investigated the use of fragrance to help reduce stress during other anxiety-inducing medical procedures (e.g., Graham et al., 2003; Braden et al., 2009; Redd et al., 2009; Kritsidima et al., 2010; Ghiasi et al., 2019). There is also a growing body of research to suggest that ‘sweet-smelling’ ambient scents can help people deal a little better with pain (e.g., Prescott and Wilkie, 2007; though see also Marchand and Arsenault, 2002; Martin, 2006).

Based on the research above, we know that scent matters. That being said, the above brands and products have made a huge difference in this house, and I have also seen how scent can impact the birth space. Do yourself a favor, and treat yourself to some of these products. You’ll be happy you did!

If you would like to order from Young Living, here is my link.

Spence C. Using Ambient Scent to Enhance Well-Being in the Multisensory Built Environment. Front Psychol. 2020 Nov 19;11:598859. doi: 10.3389/fpsyg.2020.598859. PMID: 33329267; PMCID: PMC7710513.

XOXO-Holly

Most Common Nutrient Deficicies During Pregnancy

I hear a lot of the same thing regarding nutrition and pregnancy. You are all asking your providers about food, and really what people are being told is that they should eat healthily. What does that mean? That's where I can help. Knowing what will grow a healthy baby, what foods are nutrient-dense, and how to prepare meals and meal plans is one of the best and most important things you can do. I have found that most people don't know where to start, and worse, people are often told that as long they take their pre-natal vitamins, they should "be fine." What is important to note is that "essential vitamins and minerals are dietary components required in small quantities to support virtually all metabolic activity, including cell signaling, motility, proliferation, differentiation and apoptosis that regulate tissue growth, function, and homeostasis." Vitamins and minerals support every maternal, placental, and fetal interaction stage to enable a healthy gestation.

 One of the most common deficiencies is iron, and there were even some studies that I came across that said that almost 40% of pregnant people had a prevalence of low serum iron concentration. Let's talk about foods that are nutrient-dense in iron. "The recommended intake of iron is 27 mg per day in pregnancy vs. 18 mg per day in non-pregnant women." Iron plays a vital role in red blood cell production and is essential as it supports your growing baby and placenta. Iron deficiency can increase your risk of premature birth and contribute to low birth weight. Iron supplements aren't always the best way to ensure that you are meeting your needs as the side effects are often undesirable, and of the people that did take the supplements, 89% stopped taking them due to the side effects. So, your best bet is to get as much as possible through your diet. The best source of iron that you can get is the liver. I know not many people are excited about that choice, but if your iron is low, it is probably your best bet. What are other foods high in iron? Red meat, game meat, oysters, sardines, dark meat, and poultry, If you are vegetarian or can't stomach some of the above choices, spirulina (a type of algae) is another option.

Another group of vitamins that we tend to see a high deficiency in is B6 and B12. Vitamin B6 is critical for your baby's developing brain and nervous system and helps the baby metabolize protein and carbohydrates. B6 is also helpful in managing your nausea or morning sickness. In a study out of the University of Michigan, some found relief by taking 10-25 mg of Vitamin B6 3x per day. (check with your provider to see if this is a good option for you). Sources of Vitamin B6 are Beef liver, tuna, salmon (fresh caught), fortified cereals, chickpeas, poultry, dark leafy greens, bananas, papayas, oranges, and cantaloupe. Vitamin B12 is vital for maintaining the health of your nervous system and is also essential for your baby's developing brain and spinal cord, forming healthy red blood cells, helping make D.N.A. and can help to prevent the risk of neural tube defects. In large part, B12 is found in large amounts in animal products, fortified foods, dairy products, eggs, and poultry.

Iodine. This one does not always get the attention that it deserves. According to one study, "iodine deficiency during pregnancy can cause maternal and fetal hypothyroidism and impair neurological development of the fetus. Iodine requirements are increased by 50% during pregnancy. In some cases, supplementation before or during early pregnancy eliminates cases of cretinism, increases birthweight, reduces perinatal and infant mortality rates, and even increases developmental scores in young children by 10-20%." (PubMed) Iodine is mainly found in animal-protein foods and sea vegetables. While some items like cereals, bread, and milk are fortified, there are more nutrient-dense choices. Seaweed, fish, shellfish, table salts labeled "iodized," eggs, beef liver, prunes, lima beans, and chicken are all sources of iodine.

A lot more goes into a nutrient-dense diet than eating healthy. That is just not sound advice. The other topic I want to address is that most people don't understand. How much do I need? What foods are nutrient-dense? What foods need to be paired together so that we can maximize absorption? These are all the questions we go through, personalized to your specific needs and wants, in my Pre/Postpartum Nutrition meetings. For a short time, I am offering a 60-minute session for $39 as I complete my clinical hours to sit for my exam with the NANP. If you are interested in scheduling one of these, here is the link. We will discuss how to create a nutrient-dense diet to help develop a healthy baby and postpartum time. You will have all the resources and tools you need. No more guessing! I'd love to work together.

I

Be well,

XOXO-Holly

Gernand AD, Schulze KJ, Stewart CP, West KP Jr, Christian P. Micronutrient deficiencies in pregnancy worldwide: health effects and prevention. Nat Rev Endocrinol. 2016 May;12(5):274-89. doi: 10.1038/nrendo.2016.37. Epub 2016 Apr 1. PMID: 27032981; PMCID: PMC4927329.

https://doi.org/10.1093/jn/135.5.1106

Nichols, L. (2018). Real Food for Pregnancy: The Science and Wisdom of Optimal Prenatal Nutrition. Lily Nichols.

Birth Plan Does and Don'ts.......

Your birth plan is important, and here is why. It sets your intention and helps your birth team understand what your wishes are. Here is the other reason why it is important, it helps you and your partner become clear on what it is that you both want, and that matters. I think the best part of putting your birth plan together is the education you receive in the process. In spending the time to put it together, you have to do some research, and you become empowered with that knowledge. I need you to know. This DOES NOT need to be a thesis. It won’t get read. It just won’t. I have seen birth plans exceed ten pages, and while I think it is fantastic, you have done that for you, not your team. Not a single person at the hospital is going to spend time reading that. They will smile, and make some sort of off handed remark, and put it in your pile of papers. That will honestly be it. They will continue to ask all the questions despite all of your carefully crafted wishes which you have put in that birth plan. If you truly want an effective birth plan, short and sweet. That’s the ticket. Follow my steps below for an effective, but comprehensive planning system.

• Take a childbirth Education Class. Even if it is not mine. This will not be a waste of time. Doesn’t it sound much easier to get your hands on evidence based information rather than reading random articles, research studies, and bad advice, which by the way takes hours and hours. My classes can be found here. Rhonda Fellows offers birth classes which are fantastic as well. The more you understand what is going to happen, the better you are able to plan for it.

• Your birth plan should be no more than one page. Just like a resume. Any more than that and it won’t get read. I know that this is a labor of love for you, but you want to have the most clear and simple direction. You can fit a lot on a page, trust me.

• When working with my clients I use a plan that is one page, and has icons. Seriously. My 17 year old son can navigate this birth plan, and it has all the things on it. You want it to be super simple. You can schedule a planning session with me here. You can also search on Etsy or Pixabay for the icons that you would need, build it in Canva and craft one that way. Hospital staff love this way of doing a birth plan. It takes a few minutes to look at and they then it is placed on the white board in your room. That way when there is a staff change, or new member of your birth team, everyone is clear and everyone can see it. You are not having to answer a million questions that you have already answered.

• Use evidence based information. Always. Here area a few of my favorites. Evidence Based Birth. The Cochrane Review. ACOG.

• The most successful birth plans that I have seen have one thing in common. Flexibility. When we get to attached to our plan, things can get complicated quickly. Birth is fluid. Birth changes. Birth is unpredictable. EVERYONE involved wants one outcome. Safe Birthing Person. Safe Baby. Period. When things don’t go 100% to the plan, that is ok. Just know that if some things on the plan change, other things are honored.

Your birth plan is important. The ability to birth the way we want is important. Feeling heard is important. All of this impacts how we feel about birth. We can impact our birth best when we educate ourselves about the process, plan with flexibility, and put safety first. Ask questions, research, learn about your body. You can do this, and it will be amazing!